In life before kids, my husband and I would do the weekly shop together; an opportunity at the beginning of the weekend to spend some time together after a busy week at work. We would write a shopping list. I would carry the shopping list. About half way around the shop, loading a shopping basket as we went, he would ask what else was on the list. Oh, the list! I hadn’t once looked at the list.
This sums up my relationship with lists. I’m not really a list kinda person. And yet, for a not-a-list-kinda person, I do find myself writing a lot of lists.
At school and university, I never really wrote lists. I kept everything I needed to do, or know, in my head. Ah, those were the days. My early working experience was quite similar. As I took on more responsibility and started to manage a team of people, there was too much to keep in one head so I started to keep a to do list. Over the years, I’ve tried many different methods of keeping track of all the to do’s. In recent years, I’ve trained myself to use the bullet journal technique, drawn by the appeal of containing all to do’s, thoughts, ideas, and things to remember in one place.
However, my behaviour of not really using the lists I write — whether contained in a BuJo, or otherwise — remains. I write the lists then I proceed to ignore them. A cursory glance here and there, combined with my usual trick of managing it mostly in my head. Until it builds up again, and when I see overwhelm approaching, I sit down to write another list.
Round and round it goes.
On the whole I’m reasonably content with how my imperfect system works for me. I’m not obsessed with productivity. But I do like to say yes to lots of things. I always manage to get a lot of sh…tuff done. I am curious though why I have this relationship with lists.
You see, I know lots of list people. Those lists are like a sacred doctrine in their life. They have their routines of a) write the list, b) constantly refer to the list, c) only do things on the list, d) check off the list, and e) update the list. They, too, get lots of sh…tuff done.
To list, or not to list? That is the question.
And the answer? It probably depends. I’m thinking there’s pros and cons of all approaches. I wonder if we’re all so different in our priorities, our way of thinking, our values and behaviours then does our solution need to be as unique as our individual needs?
Those who use lists prodigiously tell me that there’s no better way to keep track of everything you need to do (and more) than to work through your list. The add, tick, do routine of their list ensures that they are always on track and never miss anything, important or otherwise.
Inspired by fun stuff read on the interweb
Those who write lists (and use them) say that the best part, by far, is the rewards. That dopamine hit from checking off your to-do items is the high point for a list user.
For every blessing, though, there’s often also a curse. Chasing the dopamine of ticking off another item can lead to some really irrational behaviour (well, irrational to me). Like adding a completed task to the list just to have the joy of crossing it off again. Like having a to do item called: Update the to do list.
Lists do take work. Managing your list can sometimes replace the work, or be a real time suck. Time you could have spent doing the thing rather than adding it to a list.
This seems like madness to me but perhaps that’s just because I use lists in a different way. Lists play a different role in the way I work and live.
When it comes to the discussion on lists, there’s one thing that we all seem to agree on. The very act of writing a list makes us feel instantly lighter. We do a literal brain dump on to the page and getting things out of our heads brings clarity and reduces overwhelm. We’re able to see all of the things that were filling our thoughts and prioritise what’s important. Some of us will prioritise that list, carry it with us and work our way through it. Others, like me, will just carry the important things in our head until the next time our brains get too full of stuff.
So here’s to the list people, the no list people, the write a list and don’t use it people, or the one of a kind list people. I’ll leave you with a poem by a wannabe Dr Seuss:
Lists are good
Lists are fun
There’s a list — or not — for everyone